Dysfunctionally_Functioning

I thought long and hard about posting on this. First, I will start off by saying congratualtions to this young lady. To me Gabby Douglas is amazing. To me she is awesome. At this age I have seen so many young girls struggle with finding themselves and trying to fit in. This young sista is living out her dreams, and breaking and setting records. I know her family is proud and so is everyone in the Hampton Roads area. I can only image the sacrifices made by herself and her family. Sometime you have to make those sacrifices for the bigger picture. Now onto those who are talking about this baby hair: first, how can you all speak on something as minute as her hair with all she has accomplished in the Olympics this year? Second, who in the hell is worried about hair when youre out there doing flips and sweating? Third, have you ever thought that spending the last few years in Iowa with a non-black family it may be a little hard finding someone to nuture and take care of her hair? and Fourth, WTF? i mean seriously? she has dont more in your short sixteen years than most have done in their entire lives! And all you can think on is her hair? how shallow is that? thats some ol hood, ghetto, ass backwards, crabs in a barrel mentality! where do you draw the line between joking and cruelty? some where innocent jokes im sure, but others were just plain cruel. I really hope that the negativity does not stop her or affect her. GOOD JOB GABRIELLE!!!!! Do not let the haters get to you. keep doing you and staying focused. oh and lets not forget the williams sisters for doing their thing winnning the doubles gold1

Labels: Random thoughts and feelings, Rants and Raves

when I moved frm ATL I left my computer with a friend. She gets evicted frm her apt and leaves my stuff there. Should I be upset? The weay I found put was she was upset that her computer was in the shop and and they kept it longer than they said. So I said just use mine. She pauses and says girl u kno my mom called me and told me she had the holiday pancakes at IHOP? WTH? IHOP? WTF?1 should I be upset? In other news I started moving into my apt today and I am so excited!!! I cant wait! I wont have my furniture until friday but thats good. Im putting my stuff in slowly...

Labels: Rants and Raves

Ive come to the conclusion adults cannot live together. If ure married thats one thing but outside of that you will end up choking each other or at least thinking about it everyday. This is especially tru in the case or parent/child. whether they live with u or u with them it is not a good look. All i kno is I am 5 miles frm crazy and five miles frm hell and jail in any direction u point. Moms is driving me batty. I love her to no end however, this is not what they do. I do not see how ppl live with their parents like its nothing. I dont care if its in the basement you have a floor to yourself hell you can have a wing to yourself but at some point in time you have to realize it was not a good look. All I know is I have 3 days and a wake up and Im out this bish! we do better apart/

Labels: Rants and Raves

I'mma make this quick since I decided to forgo church and watch on line. Am I wrong for sayig I dont like kids? Not all kids just this one in particular today. My 13 yr old brother...I call him psycho sam. I really dont like him. I mean I love him dont get me wrong but as a person... not at all. He is vindictive manipulative man the list goes on and on.He hates to be disciplined in any way and will call the police an lie if thats what it takes to get his way. I think its sad that hes only 13 and is this dirty. I mean the type of dude that will hock up spit and spit in your face. Which is something I absolutely cannot donot and will not tolerate. I wont get into details about what he did this morning but I just really need to kno if I am the only person that feels like this. I pray about it and will continue to do so. I actually feel kinda bad about the way I feel cause he will make u forget he is actually a child.

Labels: Random thoughts and feelings, Rants and Raves

When is it that ppl actually mature? Case and point: my nephew is 25 years oldbut has not gotten to the place where he accepts responsibiity for his actions or life. Recently he has accused me off always being on him snd not cutting him a break. My thing is this you are a man we are ot children an you are now a father yourself when will you grow up. Noth8ing is ever his fault always always someone elses. at first I thought maybe this is because of the lack of male role models we had in our lives cause they were/are eith crackheads or alcoholics but then I kno plenty of en in the same boat who turned out different. What started this is right now we as a family is down to 1 car. moms car is in the shop sisters is in the shop and nephew got hooked by the repo man. So since everyone wants to go out on the weekend we are all trying to mske things work. My mom sister and myself all work or have school in anutha couty so this is extra hard on us. Well nephew doesnt seem to think she should put gas back in the vehicle or at least put the gas that was in there back. He thinks the more gas you have the more he can rie. Also hes had to move back home which I cant knock because I had to do the same just under different circumstances. He fels as though he should be able to lay up with his women even after being told repeatedly not to. So my sister tells him he has to be gone by theend of the year and he thinks shes wrong. Hesbeen home for 15 months. Dont relly hve to pay bills bills just hlp out around the house and have absolutely nothing to show for it. Granted hes been workiing here and there cause times are hard. However, when he had a reallygood job especially for round thes parts he lost it...y??? Cause he wanted to smoke weed. But guess what that wasnt his fault. So he stops smoking weed for 6 months get the gig he has now but gess what? Youre on them pills. Oh wait we ar not spose to kno that. Get paid on Thurs broke by Saturday. Debo-ing his brohers and cousins for their money but dont see nothing wrong with that. Its my falt hes not in ATL anymore whe I left the apt to him and our cousin who decided not to pay rent. Itsbabymoms fault hes on chsup when all she had to do was let him send the money to her insteadof getting yt fol in his business, its the credit unions fault he doesnt hae his car they kno how times is hard they coulda worked with him even though they havent been paid in 3 months. Its his rommates fault that they were kicked out of their apt which caused hm to move to Atl in the first place. Do you see where Im going with this? I partially blame our parents and grandparents for making life easier for us than it should have been but thats only about 15%. Im s over dude I mean really. Youre 25 with a decent job no real bills besides whatever moms ask and chsup yet when someone say something oh we cut eeryone else some slack but him. Are u FN serious? I dont kno if its the drugs if his oxygen was cut off in utero if I drugged him on the ground when we were small I am so confused asto how a grown man can think this way. Its definetely a case of the lil boy in a mans body. How long must this go on?I woud have thought losing everything is rock bottom but I guess not. When will we sto doing things for ppl they can and should be doing themselves? When will ppl gro the EFF up?

Labels: Rants and Raves

This is going to be short sweet and to the point. On the 7th I celebrated 24 months of celibacy. Im all happy and all that jazz then I get hit in the stomach. Tomorrow makes 8 weeks since I did my big chop. SO I'm visting my cousin and its the 1st time shes seen me in 2 mo. So she says I like it I dont know what ur parents were tripping about. I think they think your gay. What? Really? she says yeah have you told them otherwise? Im thinking my parent KNOWS Im not gay WTH? So her girlfriend says Youre not gay? I always thought you were? Uh no! Im leaving that to yall. So then cuzzo says have you tried it? You should try it you might like it... Wait dont you might like it too much and have you all turned out 'round here. Um no! Im leaving that to yall no thank u. So Im telling this story to my sister and she says they dont think youre gay its just first impressions. When a person sees a lady and shes cut off her hair thats usually the road shes on. REALLY? Because in the cities I've lived in and hungout in thats not the case. But then I begin to think about it I am in mayberry with a buch of ignorant crabs. SO I said u know I cant get mad or hurt... Small town....Small minds

Labels: Rants and Raves, Relationships

I really planned on writing something else. While Im in the computer room checking emails and catchin up on thangs psycho sammy brings me my cell. Its big sis on the other end asking me when I got Superbowl tickets. Im confused. She says I just got a msg from you askin gif I wanted to go to the game with you. REALLY? So thing 1 and thing 2 is playing on the phone. I llok at the screen and the msg says the msg will send after the call. SO we hang up and I go thru the phone to see who else they sent mgs to. They got a few people. I'm heated so I step to em and of course no one knows what I'm talking about. I guess we have a house mouse that does ish when no ones looking. And they wonder why I................ ( you can fill in the blank)

Labels: Rants and Raves

I'm at my wits end. Like I am really walking a thin line round here. These lil oooohhhh I am against calling children out of there name however, my tourettes kicked in tonight. I have one tryna show out in front his friends, one speaking espanol, one that likes to scream cry and kick walls and one that walks around in circles. 10 pm is bedtime in this house. They have to be up at 5:30 for school so they all know the drill. They like to try the system. They dont not realize just how close I am coming to quirking out. Therefore, tonight I had to call in reinforcements. I had to call my sister. These lil nadsfkashflihn are driving me to a place I dont want to be. I really think they feel as though because they are at a certain age that I won't eff them up. I have a week here 1 week. I know I can make it. All I know is once I leave I'll return in June for my neice graduation and that is the end of that. They better pray nothing happens to ole girl cause when I tell you all Ican do for them is pray they get into a nice foster home or maybe their mom to str8n up. Thats all I can do. Bet that! They have really ruined it and me on children in the process. If my children will be anything like this I dont want any. And you can put that on errrthang I love shawty!

Labels: Rants and Raves

Why is it that everyone seems to want to tell you and think they know whats best for you? I've come to the realization that I am totally different from the folks around me. I've always known it since I was little and plotted my first escape on a etch a sketch. My family wants to know why Im not married. My dad wants to know why he doesnt have grandkids (still a sore spot and subject for me. Maybe one day my grieving process will end), My sister wants to know why I wont take a job with the Gecko. I don't bleve in settling in any aspect of my life. I believe with everything I have that you should NEVER give up on your dreams.And more importantly NEVER ever settle. I'm in the process of fulfilling mine. But I often find myself saying Why Jesus Why as I try to explain this to everyone around me. I don't beleive in dating just because. I want to be married so therefore I want to date someone who wants the same thing even if its not with me. At this point in my life I dont feel as though I have anything to offer anyone but my dreams. Who the hell wants that? I want to be in a better position before I have children. Who wants to wonder if they should buy food or gas when your children are looking at you like B*&%h we hungry! I mean some stuff to me is simple. I have learned 2 important things from the church I've been at since coming back home. 1) COmmon since is not common and 2)Never try to discuss spiritual matters with a non spiritual person. They wont get it. I can see my dreams coming tru more and more everyday. If you gave up on your dreams or if you've never had any why dash someone elses? A man without out dreams and goals might as well be dead. Maybe its just me.

Labels: Rants and Raves

Are u serious? This is some ol Enemy of the state type bull.

Labels: Rants and Raves

Im counting down! My time here is finally up! After trying to find an escape I've finally got it. Picture it.... Morgan State University 2005... Its 2 weeks before graduation and ya girl finds out I'm not graduating. Now I've been battling alot these past few years especially from 2004 to the present. Most of which was my own doing. Back in '05 I was in what I like to call Luh it wasnt love it was luh. I spent sooooo much time loving someone else that I lost myself and stopped loving me in the process. I found out this nicca was engaged to someone else.( this is another entry by itself when I am up to dragging up those bad memories). This is totally not what you need to hear in your last semester of school. I spent all my energy and time focused on the dimise of my relationship and trying to function that I lost sight of what was important. (this is what I like to call the stupid woman syndrome. We've all been there. If not you then someone you know. If you havent stop reading and thank God right about.........NOW!) In the midst of it all I decided that instead of finishing my classes in the summer i would leave all together. Well we see how that worked out. Needless to say I couldn't see it then but its all so clear now. I'm glad I didnt marry that fool. He married ol gurl they gotta kid and basically theyre broke and homeless. God really do look out. But back to my escape. So I have been trying here and there to take classes and finish school to no end. After being on the plantation in Texas ( thats anutha story) I was thinkin about heading back to good ol Morgan and making it do what it do. The point hit home when my BFF Jill brought it to my attention after months of my agonizing over it in silence. So I decide what the hey. I reapply. Well things hadnt been really been looking up in my favor. Just when I thought I would reach my breaking point and quirk and end up in jail.... Viola! God/Jesus heard my cry. I'm out this joint and back in school to redo my last semester come Jan. Praise God! Hallelujah. I can see clearly now the rain is gone!

Labels: Rants and Raves

Maybe that was a lil dramatic but hey it beees like that sometime

We all know lil jon will have u fighting and goin to jail so maybe its not too wise for me to listen to him right now :).

Labels: Rants and Raves

My mom is a foster parent to my cousins kids. For the purpose of this blog I'll call them the Michelin man, Stretch Armstrong, Psycho Sam and the Pilsbury Doughboy. They are 16, 15, 12 and 8. The problem is they are disrespectful, ungrateful and just plain bad as hell. My mom begged me to move home for a few months to help her out. Hmmm. No problem. Or so I thought. Psycho Sam is the favorite in the house. Or at least hers anyway. He's been on meds since he was 3 and at that time the Dr. said under no circumstances do u allow him to be around anything that can be used as a weapon. Let's just say that he's worse now than he was then. Because he has a problem she baby's him he can do no wrong. Whatever he says goes, She will turn on Jesus himself for him. Yesterday he gets suspended from school the second school in 3 months and the 4th suspension of the year. Mind you school started in August. So one would think that he would have some sort of punishment for his actions. Which to her cleaning the house from top to bottom is enough. Now maybe that would be if she wasnt helping him with everything. Since she works nights I'm home with them. Everything I say he calls her and she overturns. Why the hell am I here? If I'm supposed to help you but you undo what i say whats the point? So I'm at the point where they can burn this bitch down and I could care less. I do sleep with one eye open in case he tries to shank me in my sleep though. HELP ME PUHLEASE!! Are considered a runanway if you're 28 years old?


Bernie MAc (RIP) Felt my pain!!

Labels: Rants and Raves